14 Nov A letter to your soul…Dear Soul

There’s a theme running through my life and work at the moment of connecting more fully with the self, appreciating who we are and recognising the divinity that we are are part of, although even as I say this it is not really a new theme but perhaps on this full super moon evening that connection with the divine part of us needs to be more appreciated, more acknowledged so I am guided to ask: If you were to write a letter (of thanks perhaps?) to your soul what would it say? Why not try it and discover what you might be drawn to say…what you might be drawn to release, recognise and appreciate also about yourself.

Some of my letter is below.  Blessings xx

Dear Soul,

I don’t know where to start so I will just start somewhere and hope it leads to something. And really that is also part of what I want to express to you – thank you for always pushing me to start somewhere and trusting that it will lead to something.

Thank you for trusting me when I didn’t trust myself. Thank you for being the quiet patience in my noise, the watchful observer in my madness. Thank you for not giving up and for being more stubborn than I am. Thank you for ensuring you relit my light more quickly than I could blow it out!

Thank you for seeing the uniqueness in me that makes me ME. Not perfection, far from it, but a perfectly imperfect individual and I thank you for helping me to realise that perfection, and striving for it, disempowers rather than empowers so thank you for the chaos and the mess and the utter beauty of a jigsaw that doesn’t fit; thank you for the inny and outty bits that are mine alone.

I’m not the easiest person to be with but you manage it and I appreciate that. Thank you for helping me to laugh at life and at myself and thank you for laughing with me rather than at me. Thank you for helping me to realise that I had to take you off the pedestal to work with you and thank you for making me realise that it is ok (for both of us) to have feet of clay. I kinda like clay anyway, makes me go all ‘Ghost’-pimpley   

Thank you for being a kick-ass negotiator and boxing me into those blasted corners. And thank you for your patience whilst I figured out what I needed to do turn the corner. I really couldn’t do your job so I thank God that you can and that you do. Please don’t stop – ever.

When I was younger I railed at life and you let me. I didn’t realise the gift that was at the time (although I am not sure that I could call 2003 a gift in any way, shape or form!) and I know I gave you as hard a time as I could but you stuck with it and with me when others couldn’t and didn’t, and you have more guts, determination and tenacity than I ever gave you credit for then. You’d think I would learn that lesson wouldn’t you but you never know…

When I look back at my life now, from my current perspective, I can see the journey. I can see where all the dots connect and I really do marvel at how incredibly things have been put together. Did I plan this or did you? Either way, that is sheer wow and somehow I don’t think I can take the credit for the catalysts being in the right place at the right time, although I would like to 

And…I know you get me. I know you get my humour and I know you get my take on things so I know that you know where I am coming from. That said I know that moving forward I probably won’t see the next dot and at the time I also may not realise where you are trying to join that dot to the previous one or the next one and therefore I will probably give you a hard time…again…and you will probably give me what I think is a hard time back but that’s ok because we will be in it together and I actually have realised that truth now – it is solid.

We are in it together – you and me. I wanted to give you what I felt would be some good advice in ‘handling’ me moving forward but really there isn’t any that I can give you that you would actually take notice of because a) you are as stubborn as me and think you always know best and b) you usually do! I’ll try and listen more – would that help?

And as for the past, well you got me here in one piece, more or less, and there’s only two things I would change in my life, so in 45 years isn’t bad!

Thank you for being you dear Soul. Thank you for allowing me to turn you grey early and for being pleased about it, at least I am not the only one! Thank you for your endless patience and commitment to me. Thank you for being so amazing that I have difficulty putting it into words that I can actually express, I know the feeling I want to say but the words just aren’t enough. Thank you for making me feel amazing. Thank you for everything you do that I don’t always see or know about or that I take for granted and so don’t always appreciate. I know that when that next curve ball comes, I am probably going to give you a bit of a challenge so thanks in advance for handling that one when it does come!

Most of all, thank you for your rainbow which brings colour into what might otherwise be a grey landscape. Blessings my friend from your friend xx

Blessings, Nicola xx