03 Apr The Power of Not Knowing Who You Are

We are always losing ourselves. Our spiritual path demands it.

How often do we hear the term ‘she/he has reinvented themselves’ in relation to famous people, artists, poets, other creative expressives…?

Our sense of self dissolves time and time and time again. And yet so often, part of our purpose (our internal directive from ourselves, for ourselves) is to understand and then identify with who we are.

So often we spend years trying to understand who we are and then identifying with that, enabling that aspect of self-identification to be part of how we validate our existence, our purpose, what we do, what we don’t do…

But what if self-identification limited us. What if it created boundaries, restrictions? What if it built walls and created fences? It does.

When we identify and rely on self-identification we create boundaries that we then have to break though. We actually put limitations on ourselves because we are saying, thinking, intending, identifying a ceiling that we cannot go beyond…we are implementing a boundary of recognised understanding which is where we ‘stop’ and yet we are intrinsically unboundaried.

We have to be. Because we are energy. Because we are Spirit.

And so we have to lose ourselves along our spiritual path because it is the only way we can move into being more of who we are.

One of the most powerful things we can do for ourselves is to say to ourselves (and mean it): I don’t know who I am.

Let’s say it again. I don’t know who I am.

How does it make you feel? Nervous? Scared? Emotional? Yet within that, is there not also a small, or even a large, spark of freedom? Of excitement? Of wonder?

When we don’t know who we are, we open the door to finding out.  We open the door to finding out who we are in this moment, rather than identifying with the person we were last year, three years ago, two months ago.

We open to door to being able to be more of who we are now…sure in the knowledge of course that this too will change because we are always evolving, always progressing, always moving more and more into who we can be, who we might be, into more and more of our potential.

But only if we are willing to lose who we are now.

Within not knowing who we are is freedom. Freedom because we don’t have to confirm to the ‘us’, to the ‘YOU’ that you think you should be, that you were supposed to be, that you expect yourself to be.

Within not knowing is freedom because we are able to explore and with exploration comes creation. Exploration always leads in some way, shape or form to creation, to a form of creative expression even and especially when that creative expression is in creating ourselves.

Through losing ourselves, and within the ability and freedom to explore who we might be, we are able to create who we need ourselves to be…

Until like all great canvases, we get painted over and a new masterpiece emerges.

Losing yourself always leads to finding more of yourself…until the journey of your spiritual development leads to losing yourself again…to enable that expansion into even more of yourself.

So don’t hang on to who you were. It is not who you are. It is not who you have the power, presence and potential to be. And it call comes from not knowing who you are.

That place, that moment of the void within the stillness where creative expression, creative explosion happens.

The real power, and grace and gift, of anything is not knowing. Because through not knowing, you give yourself the permission and the freedom to explore what might be known.

Nicola x x